Monday, September 1, 2008

.7.

I lied to him. After everything I said. After all the time I promised him I wouldn't. I did. Over a stupid video game. I'm hitting the point where I just don't care what happens anymore. I want him to live fine, but I don't give a fuck about myself. I would take out a life insurance policy then use it to help him have a better life at this point. I just feel dead inside. There's no way I can get a job here. I don't even want a job. I just want to not exist. I haven't even filled out half these applications sitting in front of me. I don't know what I'll do. I just would like both of us to go to college and just have to worry about that. Let the job part come after. I don't know

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